A dream about Jerry… May 10, 2008

I had a dream that I was trying to reconnect with Jerry, like that ghost girl did in “The Lovely Bones.”
Which was weird because I am alive, and he is dead.
So I hook up with him, and all of the sudden he isn’t a ghost anymore.
He is alive all over again. He and I hang out want watch movies, I fall asleep on the couch. He goes to sleep on the bed, and leaves me on the couch. (Off subject but the living room I was in was like the apartment we were supposed to move into a week before he died)
When he wakes up, I ask him why he did that, and he said.
I haven’t been around since 2000. I need to adjust. A lot has changed.
I said “Yeah, Clinton was still president before you died.” He went to get dressed, he had a cool hat and matching jacket. The hat kind of looked like this, but a different pattern…



We were about to leave, when all of the sudden we were in his parent’s house.
His mom and dad had not aged since 2000. It was really weird.
Jerry realized he didn’t have any cash, and he said “Do you have 10 bucks? I need to fill the car up.” I told him gas was now $3.50 a gallon, and he looked at me and said “You have got to be joking.”
We got in his car and drove away.

Of course, this isn’t the whole dream. There was more. I got to tell Jerry everything I never got the chance to tell him.
That is something, I wouldn’t share with anyone. Especially in a blog.

This dream is weird on too many levels.
1.Sex was involved, I have never had that kind of a dream about
him, because he is dead, and that would be creepy.
2. I brought him back to life. Most of my dreams involve him being incarcerated and I break him out of jail. In my dreams I never acknowledge he is dead, until this one.
3.The apartment we never moved into- I never had a dream about that place before or after he died.

It was like I brought him back, and we were where things left off. Except, the world around us was not the way it was.
I always feel bummed out after a dream with him. I didn’t feel as bummed this time. I don’t know if my dream was closure, or if I have changed.

I miss him, but my heart doesn’t feel broke anymore. This dream was everything I wished I could do in real life in the past.
I have accepted that I could never do that, and I moved on.
Maybe this dream happened because I was ready to experience the feeling of having him back.
If I would have had this dream a couple years ago, I would have been depressed and pining for him for WEEKS.
I had this dream last night, and I woke up and felt OK with where I am at now. I know he is at peace too, and maybe we will meet again in the next life .